It’s January 13th, do you know where your resolutions are? Have you already forgotten them or are you on track to achieve them? Either way, I want to give you the “Cure for the Common Resolution.”
Many people spent the end of last year reflecting on what they didn’t accomplish or fulfill. They decide if they are proud of this behavior and if they want to continue or discontinue any of it. They finish out the year and their reflections just in time for New Year’s resolutions season. Out of habit they create a common resolution to start or stop something and they hope that they are able to pull it off.
You may be familiar with the common resolutions loose weight, spend more time with family, spend less money, start dating, start a business, stop working so much or stop smoking. Any of these sound familiar? Unfortunately, the average person forgets their resolution before January even ends. Why, because resolutions don’t work. You can’t resolve to becoming a different person, you evolve.
This year’s resolution could be to give up resolutions. Forget New Year’s resolutions and try “Life Evolutions.” Life Evolutions are different. You decide to change your lifestyle or evolve into the person you desire. With a few steps and one small change per day you can evolve. It may sound over simplified, but it isn’t. If you have failed at resolutions in the past, you may doubt yourself. That is a normal symptom of the common resolution.
Here’s the cure. There are a few simple steps you need to take and you do them over a series of days. Doing them with an accountability partner can maximize the benefits. So grab a partner if you can. Taking the steps together can help you evolve together. I have coached thousands through life changes and I’ve learned that there is a system to it. I outline this system in my book, “The Art of Starting Over: A Thirty-Day Guide to Creating More Power, Peace, and Pleasure in Your Life.” You can read it if you have time but in this blog I’ll give you a few steps to kick start your “Life Evolution.”
Start with making a commitment. It works best when you write the commitment down and sign it. You then evaluate yourself. This step helps you determine what you want to adjust. This will also help you find your strengths and challenges. The strengths will help you along your journey. The challenges can get in the way so you need to be aware of them. By knowing these you can prepare for them and set more realistic goals. These two steps happen before you even create the first goal.
Now it’s time to set the goal. The goals should state the lifestyle you want. Refrain from stating what you don’t want. Instead of saying I don’t want to smoke anymore, say I would like to spend my time breathing and doing healthy living activities that add value to my life. Sounds detailed and vague at the same time for a reason. Detailed enough to help you measure. As you explore life, you can ask yourself does this add to my quality of life, and adjust as needed. Vague enough to leave room for adjustment as you find the things that add value to your life. When you answer yes, keep it in your life. When you answer no, refrain.
Be sure to differentiate between pleasure and happens. Here is an example; chocolate brings pleasure, not happiness. Seeing a loved one grow brings happiness. When the chocolate is gone the pleasure effects are gone. When the loved one is not around you may still reflect on their growth and feel the happiness. One can also remind the loved one of this time of growth and both can return to happiness. You will barely remember the pleasure of the chocolate because it didn’t make you happy. It brought you pleasure.
Finding a self-development book that focuses on your goal is helpful. Whether it’s the “Art of Starting Over” for self-development, “When The Stomach Growls” for eating healthy, or “The E-Myth” for business advancement. You also want to find a blog or podcast that you can follow. Lastly, joining a community or group is the best way to, not only execute on your goal, but get the support you need when you are down.
Summary and recap
Let’s do a little recap of the cure for the common resolution. Give up making resolutions. Commit to a lifestyle change. Evaluate your life, possibly using the book “The Art of Starting Over” or another book that chronicles a journey you want to experience. Set the goal. Be positive and specific. Be vague enough to have room for adjustments. Know the difference between pleasure and happiness. Get a book, subscribe to a blog or podcast, and join a community.
The book gets you started, the blog or podcast keep you going, and the community makes the journey fun. The members become your support system and you support them the same way. It also helps to teach what you need to learn. I will add one more tip. Find someone who is just ahead of you for motivation and someone who is just behind you for passion. If you are preaching to them to keep going you are more likely to do it too.
Follow these simple steps and you’ll never have to make another resolution again. By using this system you change your life, not just your month.
This year you can look forward to blog post on keeping good credit, changing your money programing, creating your money mission, and a bunch on love and money. In the meantime if you’d like to know your money personality take the Money Mentality Quiz HERE.